The Crabs of Life

Dear Boys and Girls,

I have to say, I am fortunate enough to have very supportive people in my life. Hm, perhaps that's because I have managed to distance myself from negative folks, from those who seem to want to drag us down.

I understand that this is not always possible, especially when the crabs are your family members or coworkers. So, when I saw this crab-article that my coachee Alison posted, I jumped on the opportunity to share it here.

I wish you success in dealing with the crabs of life!

Bring it!

Barbie, PhD

p.s. I don't know the source of the article.

***

Bucket of Crabs

Have you ever seen a bucket full of crabs? They pinch and pull as they struggle to climb over one another to reach the top of the bucket - to freedom.

Ask any fisherman and they'll tell you that a bucket full of crabs doesn't need a lid - they simply won't escape.

Why? Well, it's not impossible for a crab to climb to the top, and really if they worked together it would be quite easy. But crabs don't work together.

Instinctively crabs pull each other down-literally.

When one crab breaks away from the pack, reaching its pinchers toward the top of the bucket, the others promptly grab onto the escapee's leg, pulling him back down. That crab is then pushed to the bottom of the pile and his dream of freedom is crushed.

People have a way of acting just like a bucket of crabs. Have you ever decided on a personal goal only to have someone in your life talk you out of it?

Do you have crabs in your life? A crab is...

* The person who discourages you from going to the gym
* The person who scoffs when you mention your weight loss goals
* The person who snickers when you choose salad over pizza
* The crab mentality says "If I can't have it, then neither can you." When you decide to do something different, to reach for a goal and to improve yourself, the crabs in your life will do their best to hold you back.

Keep Crabs at Bay: When crabs come snapping, remember the following:

Ignore them:
When someone in your life begins to pull you down with discouraging words, remember that you don't have to listen. Don't let them get into your head. Mentally tune them out or politely remove yourself from the situation. Who are they to tell you what you can or can't achieve?

Understand them:
Ouch! Insults and put-downs hurt, especially when they come from people that we care about. So what is the deal? Why do your friends, co-workers and even your spouse turn into crabs when you decide to improve your life? Do they really hope that you don't succeed? The truth is that crabs are thinking about themselves-not about you. They see you attempting to better yourself and to change your life. Whether they realize it or not, this scares them. If you better yourself will you still like them? Or will you leave them behind?

You hold the power. Even the most persuasive crab doesn't hold a candle to your iron will. When you are ready to change, and you've made up your mind without an inkling of doubt, then 90% of the work is done. Your mind is the most powerful tool at your disposal.

Don't let a wimpy crab rob it from you.