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Friday, January 29, 2010


Dear Boys and Girls,

It might be hard to believe, but I'm having to adapt to this new body. I mean, I had heard this was true with people who lose a lot of weight. It's like their brain can't always catch up to their new exterior. Dallas Carter, the $250,000 Million Dollar Body Contest Grand Prize Winner, told me during my trip to Hawaii that he still suffers from occasional "fat head."

I don't think I'm fat. Not at all. But, I don't know, it's kind of strange to see this thin, fit body moving around, wearing different kinds of clothes that I probably would not have worn in the past. It's a strange thing, too, to feel as if you're treated differently, more kindly, because you're fit or thin. I guess that makes up for the idiotic comments I get a work, but still.

It's nice. And it's also strangely uncomfortable and weird.

Getting to this point has placed me in an unexpected reflective space. Interesting.

Some random, but related thoughts for the evening.

A woman on Barbie's Slim Spot commented that after seeing how much work it takes to get to where I am, she's not so sure she's willing to put in that kind of effort. Why? Because it wouldn't make her happy eating the way I do. Can I say, I totally understand.

There are far too many people (I used to be one of them) that whine about not having abs even though (in their view) they eat clean and exercise. What I'm seeing lately as I share my journey on facebook and on my blog is that more and more people are realizing that if they want to get results like mine, they're going to have to, as I said yesterday, clean it up in the kitchen and then clean it up some more. You can be fit and/or lose weight with a MODERATE amount of effort. But to get super lean and super fit, to get abs, yes, at least for me, it really does take a whole lot of work. I want to see what I'm capable of and I truly am enjoying the journey. This is what I want and I am not complaining. But don't get me wrong, there are times that I 'd like to have a drink here and there, eat a nice slice of pizza on a non cheat day, and grab a slice of cheese from the fridge just because I feel like snacking on something. It's a choice to eat super duper clean and I choose to make it.

But it's an awesome thing to know, too, that you're just not willing to give up dairy, alcohol, more than once a week cheat meal, to get super lean. There is comfort and empowerment in that.

Only you can decide what it is right for you.

On that note, I'm off to dinner at my friends' house. On the menu? Super duper clean eating, of course: curry chicken made with no salt, curry powder, just a tiny bit of almond milk, and some vegetables. Yes, it's wild, almost every aspect of my life has changed. Had non-clean-eating been on the menu, I would have almost certainly said no.

Bring it!
Barbie, PhD


Jill said...

I understand that and can very much relate to it. It is just a process, all of it. From having that fat head and others asking how can you do it. I'm still trying to get rid of that fat head. See you at summit. Miss ya girl, Jill

screwdestiny said...

Yeah, there's a different between looking good and looking amazing. Most of the time I'm content with looking good, so I don't eat near as clean and strict as you do. And I think most other people are content with that, too. As long as you look good and you're healthy, then that's really what's important. But I also think it's great that you've decided to push your body to see just what it's capable of. It's exciting to see your journey.

Mandy said...

Barbie - feeling the same way. I sit down and expect a little pooch to hang over, and don't have it. Expect some back fat over the jeans, don't have it. A stranger calls me tiny, and I flash to my old self and wonder who they are talking about!!
You are inspiration and at the same time, completely real. No sugar coating, no bullshit, just real talk. Not everyone can and will be you, but that doesn't mean that it won't motivate someone else, be their wake-up call, or simply a great story to follow.